I should be in bed. I should be asleep. I should be doing a lot of things and instead, I'm here thinking again...outloud...on the somewhat written page...or computer screen.
See, I think part of the reason I haven't just stopped blogging all together is that I use this sometimes as my sounding board, my best ventilation system if you will. And I have to admit that I do sometimes censor myself. Why? Well, I'm not entirely sure anyone always wants to hear what's going down in my head. Sometimes I don't get it, sometimes it's just too damn dark, and sometimes it's just too personal ya know? One thing I do know is this, I want an off switch at time for my brain.
Instead of going into all of what's rattling my cage right now, it's enough to say that I really need to stop talking and start walking. I mean we're already past the middle of the month here and I am no where closer to having looked for a better job yet. So, maybe I can just put this out there so I remember this as well. What is it that I want?
I want a job where I don't have to be up at the ass crack of dawn, or going in at the beginning of the night shift. I want regular hours and 40 of them a week with benefits to boot!
I want to make more than I'm currently making. This may be a sticky point but, it's what I want.
I want to be able to be creative at work. I work well with the public in general. I like entertaining folks and chatting with them. Hell, I even enjoy chatting with some of my vendors (although it's not like I'm looking to hang out with them). I guess I just get along well (for the most part) with people.
So....anyone have any suggestions? I'm not joking here folks. I don't know how to write a resume to save my life (other than for acting) so I'm sort of scared about all of this. It would be a major shift in my life but I think it's one I need to make because, while this one works...it's not really giving me what I want anymore.
Hell...maybe I just need that vacation I keep talking about. My friend J better cough up the dosh like he said he would at the end of the month. I won't be destitute if he doesn't, but it would make my life a little easier. Also would make it possible to actually get the flock out of here for a while and go somewhere. That is, if I could get over myself and allow myself to go out and just have fun for cryin out loud. AHHHHHHH! I could so use a new brain :)
6 comments:
If you find that job, let me know. I want it too.
Pookie, I'll totally help you with the resume... I took classes in resume writing in college, and I've helped tons of my friends with their rezzies. (Just another piece of proof that I am Superman and do everything).
And RE: using blogs as a sounding board...
I often censor myself, putting things up and then taking them down hours later because I realize how raw it sounds. And plus, since some of my "real world" friends read my blog and I'm a bit more vulnerable with them, I don't often talk about EVERYTHING I think. So, as I do, write what you feel comfortable putting out there... and save the other stuff for friends like me, who understand you better (even though when we talk, I feel like you can't shut me up, and can't get a word in edge-wise).
Things will get easier once your motivation gets stronger to find a gig. And if a kick in the pants is what you need, I'll provide it. And honestly, let me know if you need help with your resume. If anything, that's the first step to finding a job.
If you don't get to Hollywood (which I HOPE!) you know my offer still stands.. ;-)
Wow Michael I love the new look of your blog really cool.
Honey you know what my suggestion is. You talked with James about it at length at Christmas. It's not a bad gig. Might be worth a try.
Great offer from mrsecret :)
I censor myself too, sometimes I think of setting up another blog where I can really bitch :)
Post a Comment