Cyberchats

Good god it's late. Almost 1am and I'm still up. Just had to jot this down so I don't forget that;

It's all about friends that you may not have met but who love and accept you.
Even the people you chat with online can be more supportive than those you see everyday.

I love me some Ruby Jane. I hadn't talked with her in forever and there she was on a board a frequent and I was in chat, she jumped in and here it is maybe 2 hours later and we're just finished. I so wish that I had the time and money to just go and visit her. I wish we all lived closer to one another. I don't know if we'd get along in person, or if all of us off the board would even be able to deal with each other but....there are just some people that you love for no good reason.

I have a bad mothering streak. I know this. I've had it all my life. I want to protect people and try and drive away their ills. Just silly to me sometimes though cause I'm worried that they'll think that I am "hitting on them". I had to ask a friend from the same board if he realized I wasn't perving on him because we all get a bit raunchy from time to time and definately irreverant. Luckily he laugh (well he "lol"d) and said that he knew I wasn't. He's just this really talent kid from Wyoming that makes amazing artwork and ... well he can't seem to find a decent woman. I guess I really like Synth cause he appears that he'd be rather shy to some degree and shy people make me more comfortable cause I fit that discription off line. Still, I wonder if he'd freak if I hugged him.

You ever had that happen? You ever find yourself wanting to just reach through a computer and hug the stuffings out of someone cause they just seem like they could use one? But i don't know if it would freak him out. Ponderous indeed. Of course the big problem is that I do think that he's cute too so...added issues on my part. Maybe I need a new rule that states: "Thou Shalt Not hug those that thou thinkest art cute." cause once that barrier is broken, I want more hugs from them. Does that make me the needy one?

Still, all in all, I know that I have people that care and love me even without having met me in person. It's definately a warming feeling. Gives ya hope in an odd way. Makes me dream more as well. Maybe out there in the cosmos, there really is the "right person" and I just haven't met them yet. Better than thinking that I had and lost them. Not going there tonight. Definately not going to open that can. I'll save that for another time.

Amazing how at 1am, my mind seems to work the best and processes things so well. How little things somehow suddenly click. The universe seriously does like it's little tricks and jokes, but right now I know that they're laughing with me becuase they're happy for me. So, Thanks out there. Thanks for the love and friends.